Imagine you’re a man.
Imagine you’re a real, honest to goodness, manly man kind of man.
The kind of man who spits in the eye of danger.
A man…..like this man.
Imagine you’re this man….out on the range…..herding ten thousand head of cattle across the country….through a driving thunderstorm….fighting off a gang of rustlers…..sleeping on rocks….growing a fantasticÂ mustacheÂ and driving all the local women mad with desire.
Imagine you’re THAT kind of man.
Now…..imagine what kind of yogurt you’re going to eat for breakfast.
That’s right, I said yogurt.
But not just any yogurt.
Not your wife’s sissy yogurt.
I’m talking about the new giant tub of manly man yogurt from New Zealand dairy company Fonterra.
Marketed under the brand name Mammoth Supply Co., this yogurt is made for the kind of guy portrayed by gravel voiced actor Sam Elliot.Â In fact, Fonterra hired Elliot to to convince all Kiwi males thatÂ “Men can eat yoghurt.” Just as long as it’s thick and chunky and built to tame a man’s hunger.”
In their print ads, Fonterra tells us that â€œThis is a menâ€™s yoghurt and you are a man. Now find a spoon, fork, or spade and dig in.â€
So what separates Mammoth yogurt from all of those “female-friendly” yogurts in your local supermarket?
As reported inÂ The New Zealand Herald, MammothÂ yogurt is filled with fruit, seeds, grains and barley. It also comes in rectangular 325-g cartons, which is more than double the size of your typical “girly-man” individual-sized servings.
Now, if only they can do something about quiche.